Thursday, October 8, 2015


5 weeks

4 games

I'm tired.

and I'm married...

and oh so grateful.

Though I haven't written in a LOOOONG time....I have been working on my mirror experiment. Sometimes it is only a piece of myself that I look at.  But I am looking.  I think is helping me see me...and not what I wish I would see.  Because of that, I could look at some of the photos people have taken of me, especially the wedding photos, and see the absolute joy.

Yeah...I'm fat...but so what...I me.

So....Grant and I started a 3 week challenge this Monday(more numbers), no sugar....lots of grains.  Gotta kick start something.  I gained back the weight I had lost post surgery...but more importantly, I just feel slow and sluggish and icky poo.

Went back to the gym yesterday too.

BJ said it was fine to just lift an empty bar....

5x5 box squats  worked up to a whopping 135
5x5 RDL  95
3x15 Good mornings  45
50 leg curling thinggies with a band.

Felt good to move again.

BJ and I talked for a long while about this off season....what my goals to approach the next 6 months.  

I know I can have goals, but I also know from the path I have been stumbling and running and tripping on the last 5 years...that I really have no clue what might be coming.

I wanna take care of myself in a more consistent way....I want to be kinder, more forgiving.  Both more accepting and more willing to stand and fight.

Hard to program that with deads and back squats~but given the path I have wandered so far, I know they are linked.

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