"I keep asking myself these three questions ... What do you have? What do you want? What will you give up?"
I recently posted on Facebook, asking folks to share what they had been working on and if they had reached their goals, if they were still working on it, if new goals had emerged. I know the end of the year usually bring some sort of lens to this issue. I love reading what people share on those sorts of posts.
I had a funny thing happen to me surrounding goals this year. Well, I had a LOT of funny things happen to me this year, but I digress. After Emery had healed up and once I got my invite to PTown...I had this idea that I could drive it in six weeks and be something I had not trained for. I know in my head that training is a year round deal, even when I get injured; I have to do all the work to get me and my old ass body parts moving again.
I also found myself looking and being a stalker on lots of the amazing women's pages who are really kicking it this year...and yes....I found myself feeling...not jealous, but envious. I know it is semantics, but they seem different to me. I was feeling envious of the time they could put in...
and somewhere along the line I saw the quote at the top of the blog.
What will I give up?
That's a big one.
And you know...my artistic life and my time as a Scottish Athlete were and are the things that I was willing to give up as we negotiated the last few years. I had not thought of it this way before I saw this quote. And frankly it took me a while to get here.
So....as I look forward to an off season, from a season where I actually threw a little bit, I need to ask myself before I get started: What do I have, as in where am I starting from. What do I want, as in what area of my life will I be sending more of my energy. What will I give up?
My dear friends, I don't know....I don't know and cannot seem to decide where or what to focus on right now.
So, I guess for right now, I will try to quiet my brain a little and see what comes my way.
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