games update.

I have been meaning to write about the games last weekend...

but....

Well.

Yeah.

I am coming up against some transitions in my personal life that I am really struggling with.

Point 1...learning to step back and not try to fix everything.
Point 2...not taking bait...I suck at this.
Point 3...letting the dirt of the past lay still so the new seeds can grow.  Tough when point 2 is such a sticking point.
Point 4...shutting off all of the 'shoulds' especially the parental shoulds.


oh games update...

Snowmass was weird...beautiful and weird.
The games were bumpy but I know they will iron that crap out....small stuff.
I have a major girl crush on Edie for more reasons than I care to admit.
I had lots more pain in my leg while throwing than I thought I would.
I actually threw all but one throw...finished the game.

I was flat on my ass tired (not sore) for longer than I thought I would be after the game...at the end of the day I got really down on myself...Pathetic to go there.  I guess I have a lot of work to do.  Frankly, the issues in my personal life and on the field are really the same.

There is no perfect, there really is no best...there is only the best you can do at any given moment, and sometimes that is really not very good...but it is all you have. And sometimes it really is the best, but no one sees it that way, especially yourself.

I did my best, the best I had to give, the most I knew how to do....I am sorry for many things, but I am not sorry for saying enough is enough. 

I am going to approach this like I am supposed to approach the field...each throw is new...yes, you build on all the work and even perhaps your previous throws, but if you obsess over everything you did wrong on the last throw....you will only repeat it.  Whisper the little cues instead.

Chest up.
Eyes forward.
Let it go.
Let it fly.
I am enough.

Breathe.